fight of faith (♥)

Sunday, May 31, 2009

it don't feel right, when you're gone

had lots and lots of fun with 2C clique (:

never been so happy since you-know-what.

i missed you guys /:

more outings soon, yeah?

spent the morning at church,

afternoon shopping with kellie,

and night with clique :D

natm2 was a pretty good movie,

despite the fact that most of the time i was laughing at the weird people beside me

(who laugh at things that aren't funny and zihigh DURING the movie)

ate B&Js,

used BROWN ENVELOPES to wipe our hands LOL.

and laughed at our own jokes. haha.

then went home 8D

-----

sometimes, we try so hard to see things that are far away, that we forget to admire those near us.

Labels: church, clique, epiphany, feelings, friends, happy

written on
11:21 PM

Saturday, May 30, 2009

boulevard of broken dreams

i don't know why, but everytime i come online, i'll feel like crying.

-----

so, open house today.

nothing much.

slacked, talked to some parents, sang songs, etc.

and 李老师 said me & haonan should go join the senior high dudes' band cos we liked singing so much. lol -.-

left early with my mama & bro.

went to orchard.

shopped till 6+.

died of heat & aching feet.

(amazing how that can happen when i'm shopping in sports shoes, aren't they supposed to make you feel not so tired?)

i feel proud of myself for only buying one magazine 8D

and next time, i'm going to spend my summers working in a bookshop.

there's just something magical about being around books.

i have no idea what, but i just love that feeling.

my internet's having some weird glitches.

sad life.

-----

took me 20mins to fix the internet -.-

Labels: happy, random, rants, school, sj

written on
9:33 PM

Friday, May 29, 2009

chu le shan 8D

okay.

i'm not in the mood to post something not superficial.

so yeah, i don't know what to post about.

last day of semester one.

it feels like just yesterday when i came into 3B,

sticking with wuyue every since she joined 3B too.

and today's my last day sitting with leshan ):

i miss her alr. haha.

looking forward to next term, sorta.

i dont want lesson. i just want to spend more time with my class.

heh. sounds weird.

Labels: feelings, friends, school, thoughts, tired

written on
10:19 PM

like the way we used to be

i'm feeling much better after talking a whole lot to haonan.

even though what i said to him has nothing to do with why i'm emo.

hm. emo sounds like such an easy word.

it's not even feeling sad. it's like self pity.

like thinking "i'm pathetic."

i guess Change makes me feel that way.

it's like when something suddenly goes the other direction,

not the one that i'm used to, i'll feel like i'm the one that's wrong.

because although they all say it's easier to blame others,

i tend to blame myself.

ah well.

it's over. somewhat.

i'm feeling veryvery tired.

training was kinda fun.

no mood to post now

haha.

open house tmr. nights.

Labels: epiphany, happy, school, sj, thoughts, tired

written on
9:47 PM

Thursday, May 28, 2009

have you ever wondered why?

i'm having this really bad inferiority complex now.

i'm sorry for wanting to be a stupid, immature teenager.

because sometimes i think i'm thinking too much.

and sometimes, being childish helps me to forget to think.

to feel happy about myself for a while.

but most of the time i just end up having conflicting interests,

knowing that what i want and what i should do is impossible to co-exist.

i'm sorry that i can't live up to anyone's expectations.

i fell short of my own expectations in my studies, in controlling my thoughts,

i didn't do my best in many things for fear of failure,

i practically dashed my own dreams and saw the people closest to me getting them.

and the worst thing is that it happened in more than one count.

i'm sorry for being less of a friend, and more of a bitch.

i couldn't really stand being close to anyone for a while.

i needed to sort things out with myself, to know who i can trust,

who won't build me up and tear me down like so many have done.

i couldn't be there when you needed me, so i'm not expecting you to be here now.

(even though i really wish you were here)

i'm sorry for not shaking off my bad habits.

for not cleaning my room.

for not doing the things i'm supposed to do.

i'ld say that i didn't have enough time with studies and all that whatnot,

but now i think that's all just an excuse.

i'm sorry for feeling pathetic for myself,

for being jealous of you,

for telling myself that i'm an idiot to keep giving in to you.

but i guess that's what our 'friendship' is built upon.

me giving you whatever you want.

i guess i'm just not strong enough.

i'm sorry for wanting to be that kid that i used to be.

because it's impossible to turn back time now.

-----

i'm actually crying now.

this might become a thursday ritual.

only it gets worst.

last thurs's interclass was probably just the normal sad cry.

what i'm feeling now is like 10 times worst.

because i told myself i won't cry over you again.

and it's not the first time i'm feeling like that.

Labels: clique, emo, epiphany, family, feelings, friends, goals, rants, supernova, thoughts, tired

written on
11:26 PM

here at your side

it hurts so bad, i could just break down and cry.

it's not even feeling left out now.

i think it's jealousy.

planned to sleep early today,

but now it's all gone down to working on idmi.

it seems like all days that i thought start well will end with me being sad.

Labels: clique, emo, family, feelings, friends, school, supernova

written on
10:17 PM

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Look up the stars are fading

pretty good mood today.

school was a waste of time.

had 1 hr of math, and a slack-ish hcl,

then free period all the way.

finished chem hw + phy assg 8D

and died of laughter trying to read traditional chinese to le shan.

haha.

then went to j8 with kellie (:

first real 'shopping' trip with her.

we finished circling the mall in 7mins.

lol. then slacked in mcs and then went home.

playing sims 2 now.

for future reference: http://www.magiciso.com/tutorials/miso-magicdisc-overview.htm

Labels: clique, friends, happy, homework, random, school, wants

written on
7:52 PM

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

TLF

I still find the fact rather hard to swallow.

& I fear the consequences of that action.

man. I should just mind my own business.

Labels: feelings, friends, random, rants, supernova

written on
8:20 PM

Contrasting mindsets

Updated my photobucket.

On my way to Flickr now.

Not in the mood, though.

Labels: random, rants

written on
7:32 PM

who said that it's better to have loved and lost?

i spent my time wishing,

but you got it through asking.

i guess i still don't have the right connections,

and you're still better than me.

-----

slept through half the lessons today.

I think Ms Low's weird.

I was staring at her throughout the lesson, and she still says I'm sleeping -.-

like third day alr, wth.

Free period during LA,

slept a bit in Physics.

Cool aeroplane dream. haha.

Quiz in chem. I rocked more than Le Shan 8D

HCL was damn funny cos of Le Shan.

aw man.

we have like 3 days left together D:

I'll miss sitting next to you and ego-ing.

had lunch with Hui Jun & Pearl.

funny experiences. LOL.

I think thinking makes me tired more easily.

and today i was contemplating how true the quote

"when he came back, it's as if he never left." was.

And I concluded that it's more true than most other things.

i miss you. and benny. and the many things that I'd let slip through my fingers.

written on
5:04 PM

Monday, May 25, 2009

curly hair babies. lol

i'm tired.

haha.

died of unglamness by sleeping on the train.

i think i slept on the shoulder of the old man next to me D:

next time i won't be lazy and instead take to marina bay so i get my panel seat.

LOL.

school was okay.

died of laughter during assembly.

haha. hint: curly hair babies

oops X:

after sch stayed back to go home with huijun.

talked cock while waiting for the bus and stuff.

- brb dinner -

- okay back. -

i have a sudden craving for chocolate icecream D:

shall go hunt for it in my fridge.

lol.

Labels: clique, friends, random, school, wants

written on
6:43 PM

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Caris's PM: I miss hardcore trainings :(

my sister's PM: I miss trainings ):

LOL.

Labels: random

written on
11:14 PM

let's spend tonight on top of the world

9 more days to sims 3 8D

i'm feeling better, i guess.

sorted things out with myself in the car ride to malaysia.

decided that it was okay to fall head over heels, as long as i know the limit.

funny how that's supposed to sound like what a mum tells her child.

- gets interrupted by phonecall from daisheng -

it's so weird conversing in chinese over a phone o.o

anw.

i like the way long car rides make me think.

it feels different from travelling in other forms of transport.

i guess i love the speed and the quietness the most.

someday, i'm going to drive down an empty winding street,

under a blanket of stars; music playing in the background,

trying to find the way back into myself. (or to you)

Labels: emo, epiphany, happy, school, supernova

written on
9:33 PM

Saturday, May 23, 2009

i just realised that i won't see wuyue until next term.

i miss her already ):

Labels: feelings, friends, random, thoughts

written on
9:04 PM

10 days to sims 3 D:

can't wait <3

Labels: random, wants

written on
8:07 PM

each touch belongs to each new sound

i'm sorry i didn't try hard enough.

rolling ideas around in my head,

but never picking one of them.

i suddenly crave for apple juice.

Labels: emo, epiphany, random, wants

written on
6:45 PM

&what makes the one to shake you down?

oh my.

i love the new moon poster X:

saw the latest edition of FA manual today.

totally fab and nicer looking than the one i have.

lol.

retail therapy cheers me up.

sometimes.

Labels: random, wants

written on
6:37 PM

i think the difference between the blogs of those who won and those who didn't is ironic.

-----

i like hiding in my head.

it makes me feel like alice in wonderland,

being able to do what i want to,

and being all that i wanted to be.

it's like opening your eyes to a whole other world.

i'm still repeating head over heart.

because right now,

i'm feeling like a stupid teenager who knows what's good for her but isn't doing it.

Labels: emo, epiphany, random

written on
11:19 AM

lying straight in your face

i don't know why i'm still hoping that i'll receive an sms from you.

Labels: emo, supernova

written on
10:55 AM

Friday, May 22, 2009

feeling like shit.

my toe's hurting like shit.

can't even move it.

i'm feeling sad and tired.

gonna sleep now.

if i can, that is.

couldn't sleep the whole mrt ride back:

pain toe + sore throat + lots of things in my mind.

blah.

malaysia tmr.

i miss my cousins):

Labels: feelings, sick, tired

written on
11:09 PM

the hardest part is leaving

I feel like I'm building a wall to keep everyone out.

(or to keep myself in.)

i went blog hopping just now.

made me cry even more.

jiamin, you weren't useless.

i was.

fuck.

i have no idea how many times i used that word today.

and i was pretty sure everytime i said it, i meant it.

my family doesn't even care that i lost.

they don't even see me crying.

they're just too caught up in their lives to see mine.

-----

hey, pearl.

cheer up.

-----

i miss cresmic.

right now, i should be getting a million convos to cheer the players up,

i should have went to dinner with my clique,

i should have cried my heart out because they did too.

3B's just that different, i guess.

but i can say that i love 3B more than i loved 2C.

Labels: emo, epiphany, family, feelings, friends, thoughts

written on
10:32 PM

Why do I keep running from the truth?

i really don't know what to say.

it's not the first time such things happened.

it's not the first time i saw everyone try their best.

everyone except me.

i didn't even break a sweat, how am i supposed to believe that that's my best?

i don't know.

seriously.

after the first match, i didn't know what happened to me.

i wasn't demoralized. hell, i wasn't even sad.

i was feeling pathetic for myself.

wondering what the fk happened to believing in myself.

wondering what the fk happened to my beliefs.

head over heart.

ha.

never happened.

never will.

i don't know if you noticed,

but i realised it was just the team, and me.

two separate entities mistook as one.

when ziyi was speaking to the team,

i felt fking extra.

like i wasn't supposed to be there.

like i was there because of some serious mistake.

i seriously don't know.

to ziyi, rason, dawei, adalric & kaiseng:

thanks for being there, training us and all that stuff.

i'm really sorry i didn't perform well at all.

that i didn't give it all that i had.

that even though i knew crying wasn't going to solve anything,

all i wanted to do was to run away and hide.

thanks for being my friend.

-----

hey you.

i didn't know whether you were talking to me.

whether you were trying to comfort me or the team or whatever.

or trying to see how unglam i looked when i cry.

so in case you were talking to me,

thanks.

-----

feeling like shit and i just want to rot and die now.

bye.

Labels: clique, emo, epiphany, feelings, friends, notes, rants, school, supernova, thoughts, tired, wants

written on
10:06 PM

Thursday, May 21, 2009

bloody tired.

gonna sleep now.

didn't do any hw.

damn screwed.

i'm hyping myself up ._.

zi-hiiiiiiiiiiiiigh 8D

Labels: random

written on
11:24 PM

bang.

ha.

forgot to post abt friendly with 3E.

was pretty fun.

tied with them.

& sorry rene for hitting you X:

i think i killed half a million people today.

oops.

haha.

go 3B(:

Labels: happy, school

written on
10:41 PM

the best we could give

head over heart. head over heart. head over heart.

set that on repeat.

i'm having an inferiority complex now.

i don't think i'm able to do it.

i'm just not good enough.

shot hoops from 1.45 to 6.45.

5 hours.

and i only shot like 10 baskets.

if that's even a proper term.

i'm not fast enough.

not agile.

and i dislike jumping.

jeez.

i don't know.

i feel really disappointed in myself.

what happened to all those hoops i shot yesterday?

what happened to all the stuff ziyi and the rest taught us?

why am i all talk and no show?

head over heart.

tommorow i'm not gonna look at the person i'm against.

i'm not gonna link them to who i know they are.

i have to treat them as strangers.

and i don't like it.

tommorow, i'm gonna look at my team mates and think:

we're gonna win. maybe not the trophy, but at least we won by doing the best we could,

even if we don't think we did.

i'm typing that today because tommorow,

i don't think my brain will accept any of that.

3B, ily ♥

Labels: clique, epiphany, feelings, friends, notes, school, supernova, thoughts, tired, wants

written on
9:47 PM

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

800 hits 8D

haha.

keep it up people (:

Labels: random

written on
10:23 PM

hm.

kinda felt jealous today.

i guess it's habit alr ):

i don't see what you see in ___.

gonna sleep now.

bye love.

Labels: feelings, random

written on
10:13 PM

I don't want another pretty face

oh my.

i'm feeling extremely sleepy at 9.50pm.

not a good sign D:

haha.

stayed back after lecture to play ball with amanda, huijun & pearl.

waited and waited and waited for a free court.

Then got sianed and played monkey instead.

amanda's a great monkey. LOL.

got a court at like 5+?

then left me and amanda -.-

trained with wen ning. and played match against some other class.

(which i forgot)

went back at 6.30 I think.

and if you just keep quiet in buses, you never know what gossips you'll hear.

so we should all learn from CME lessons,

DON'T HAVE BGR.

cos you'll breakup if you reject having sex.

LOL.

it was damn funny hearing that.

ah well.

shall finish up hw and sleep.

no mood to post anything chim today ):

Labels: clique, friends, notes, school

written on
9:25 PM

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

omg.

it's 11 +.

i'm sleepy D:

nights.

Labels: random, tired

written on
11:05 PM

Hi Kellie!

this post's for you.

I know how you feel.

it's like I want to move on, but I have no idea of how to do it without losing who I am.

But that's the point of moving on: changing.

Getting new perspectives, gaining new friends.

Having new jokes to laugh at, highing on different stuff.

But ultimately, having fun(:

So yeah. Don't pull back.

Go get new friends.

Just remember that the old ones are still there for you if you're there for them ;)

Labels: clique, epiphany, friends

written on
10:14 PM

it takes all my will power to try not to cry with every breath i take.

because everything's so bottled up, the tiniest push could set me off.

like a bomb.

Labels: emo, epiphany

written on
9:07 PM

&(I'm just a kid)

她送我的礼物叫做“面对”。

I guess that's one thing I learnt from my compo.

Facing people. Facing problems. Facing reality.

I'm just so, so tired of missing you guys these days.

So I'm giving up, and living life.

Had fun in PE today :D

3 more days to interclass.

go team ;)

make 3B proud, yeah?

Math test was pretty easy.

That being said, I probably flunked it.

I can't have a high expectation of myself.

Because then, I'll slacken down and fall even faster; even harder...

HCL was both happy and disappointing, in a way.

Sure, I got a B for chinese.

way above the C i was expecting.

way above the C/Ds that I've got since Year 1.

But what's the point?

I flunked my other subjects.

My GPA epic died,

I'm just not good enough.

I don't know.

My parents don't have high expectation of me.

But sometimes I wish that they do.

Because now, all I want is some recognition to say "Yes Christine, you've done it."

Because now, I feel really, really sad for myself.

Accepting reality.

I'm not able to do it.

Yet.

Labels: clique, emo, epiphany, family, feelings, friends, goals, school

written on
8:16 PM

Monday, May 18, 2009

round and round the merry go round.

- you never know how i felt. -

Labels: emo, random

written on
9:00 PM

hm.

was veryveryvery emo this morn.

idk why.

got bloody pissed by whoever that spilled water on my math notes.

nearly cried of anger ._.

that's just me.

tear ducts connected to everything.

sian.

got class tee today.

pretty nice. i guess.

studying math now.

no mood to post.

15 days to sims 3.

Labels: emo, school, wants

written on
7:23 PM

Sunday, May 17, 2009

there's always gonna be another mountain

okay, move over, nothing to look at.

it's just a normal break from life:

forgetting people,

becoming less of a friend,

losing the past.

so yeah, move along before it hurts.

because in the end, it hurts more than the start.

because in the end, you find yourself abandoned.

because in the end, you're the only one you can count on.

-----

there's a million things I can connect to in My Sister's Keeper.

so I guess I'm as much an attention seeker as Anna.

hm.

i really want breakfast tmr.

i need a little humour before school starts.

Labels: clique, emo, epiphany, feelings, friends, school

written on
8:54 PM

16 days to sims 3.

can't wait.

seriously.

written on
7:51 PM

choose one:

a. winning the competition and losing your friends

b. losing the competition and keeping your friends.

c. losing yourself.

caught a cold + muscle aches leftover from TOC ):

i want breakfast tmr.

Labels: emo, epiphany, random, sick, wants

written on
6:16 PM

And sometimes, all we want is a little attention.

yeah. in the end, we realise that all humans are selfish.

back to doing homework, then.

Labels: emo, epiphany, random

written on
3:40 PM

Saturday, May 16, 2009

we're all looking for something to take away the pain.

Labels: epiphany

written on
10:15 PM

i feel like i'm the only one who's alone.

everyone has their year 2 clique to fall back into.

all i have is kellie to talk to.

everyone has new friends.

i'm the what homework do we have today person in my clique.

everyone has someone to go to and from sch together with.

i just look like a klutz that carries too many things and has no friends to help.

emo jag today.

don't mind me.

Labels: emo, feelings, friends

written on
7:01 PM

benny won.

i don't feel happy about it anymore.

weird, much?

since i've put in most of my thursdays for CTs and stuff,

and had loads of fun with benny,

i guess i should be happy, shouldn't I?

but no.

when they announced "first: benedictus",

it was like. "oh. okay. now what?"

when we walked out the door,

i had to fake it.

yay! we won! i'm so happy :D

because i couldn't dampen the spirit of benny.

because i was still wearing that name tag.

the one that says team 6

the one that says i'm the leader

i don't know.

maybe you guys have never been in a case where you've put in your best,

but at the end, you don't even get a smile from those that matter to you.

because in your cases, you get the whole corp to be there.

you get all the attention.

because we don't matter enough.

-----

yongsheng, thanks for that sms.

it really matters(:

and haonan, charge your ipod touch.

haha. i'm determined to beat your scores 8D

Labels: emo, epiphany, feelings, friends, sj, thoughts, tired

written on
6:03 PM

Friday, May 15, 2009

loved today.

bball practice for interclass + final comp train.

benny, jy for intracomp tmr yeah?

i love you guys <3

Labels: random, school, sick, sj, tired

written on
11:15 PM

Thursday, May 14, 2009

y'know when they say there's no right or wrong answers,

what they're really saying is that there's their answer and your answer.

and 90% of the time, their answer's better.

Labels: epiphany

written on
10:02 PM

SIMS THREE OMFG

i'm a happy girl :D

got my sims 3 preorder,

chinese test is over,

and A for geog 8D

my gpa's saved.

crossing fingers that math isn't a C ):

wait for epiphanies after i'm done with homework.

Labels: happy, homework, random, school, sick, wants

written on
6:23 PM

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

happy birthday rpatzz.

no mood or strength to deco this post.

tmr or sth, yeah?

but you'll never be my edward cullen X:

Labels: birthday

written on
10:38 PM

chinese compo's only half done.

and i'm dying of a really bad cough here.

i have no idea how i'm going to command std 2s tmr):

going to sleep now.

shall hope for the best.

Labels: homework, random, sick, tired

written on
10:22 PM

rainbows don't last forever.

i'll meet you at the pot of gold, love.

Labels: random, thoughts

written on
8:01 PM

bang bang you're dead. x factor.

yeahyeah.

i'm the lucky girl with 3 weeks alone at home.

though i'll probably die of loneliness by the third day or sth.

hm.

today went pretty well, i guess.

cept that the i got rope burns from my paper bag ):

hurts like hell.

LA lecture was pretty cool.

it was like a rewinding of time, somehow.

mr ken just takes words out of my head, loosely speaking.

"love" in high school's a posession, social standing, pride.

wonder where i heard that before.

i guess x , to me, is someone realising that they're not themselves anymore.

no, it's not the way someone looks in the mirror and say "hm, i've changed"

it's being so sure that you're on the right path,

that this is what you want to be, what you aimed for,

and then suddenly you hit this invisible wall that says "are you sure?"

and you realise that you're not.

that all the confirmation, all the determination was just a lie.

a lie to yourself. a lie that everyone saw through.

a lie that slaps you in the face and walks away laughing.

x sends you to a rewind,

makes you lose yourself.

because in the midst of all that lying, deception and facades,

you forgot who you were before.

that makes someone go against themselves.

-----

i don't get why people fall asleep in LA lectures.

it's like the most interesting lesson on my timetable.

mum's getting me sims 3 tmr 8D

i'm looking forward to the end of sch tmr alr.

and tmr i have to bring bread to sch alr -.-

thanks ah rason, now i have 2 bucks for the rest of the week ._.

signing out, love.

Labels: epiphany, feelings, happy, homework, school, thoughts, tired, wants

written on
6:09 PM

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

no, i'm not done with mugging, i just got attracted to sims 3.

mama's buying it for me 8D

i'm happy LOL.

Labels: happy, wants

written on
8:44 PM

i shall mug finish the stack of stuff beside me before coming online again.

bye (online) world.

Labels: homework, random

written on
8:20 PM

smile like never before

HAPPY BIRTHDAY (KOH) JIAMIN!

on the other hand,

if i ignore the pathetically heavy bag,

the fact i embarassed myself countless of times on the public transport,

and that i'm pretty disappointed abt my physics grades,

today's pretty nice.

i rock polynomials 8D

and i miss ms chen):

slept/laughed at leshan&shaun/ap-ed through the rest of the day.

i'm shocking myself with the things i do.

lunch @ mcs with wuyue, pearl & huijun (:

15 followers on twitter.

i feel quite sad. LOL.

tag replies:

@jiayi yeah. haha. saw you there didn't i ;)

@amanda told you! lol

@pearl yeap, just me, the internet connection and sims 3 8D (okay. i'm ignoring the hw)

Labels: random, rants, school, tag replies

written on
5:28 PM

Monday, May 11, 2009

me against the world.

y'know i'm past caring about societal views.

i'm gonna be a friend.

i'm not going to care whether they say

"OMG. she's talking to that guy", like he's a kind of pest.

i'm not going to care about the rumours that are going to start.

i'm going to stick to my beliefs.

i've been a really bad friend these days.

i've been selfish, i've been wrong.

you were there when i needed to talk.

i should just bear with all your whining.

i think i was much worse.

y'know like you've been looking at this direction for so long,

then suddenly you turn and realise the grass's greener on the other side,

and you wonder, "why didn't i see that earlier?".

because you were a one track mind,

a train on the path to collision.

and i was that other train that was going to collide into you.

paths meet even if you didn't mean for them to.

i'm gonna fight the setbacks.

i'm gonna find myself in this act.

i'm gonna show the world that nothing can beat faith, trust, and a little pixie dust.

it's me against the world now.

Labels: epiphany, feelings, friends, thoughts

written on
10:53 PM

sims 3 or not sims 3

let's get addicted to tap tap revenge,

so we'll become fast friends.

spent most of aop playing taptap / penguin game.

which i epic failed ._.

I SHALL TRY HARDER NEXT TIME?

haha.

then ate lunch at mcs with sqdmates,

met family at tampines popular.

bought alotalot of stuff.

and shopped like anything O:

spent like $142 in total at popular?

haha.

MY RECEIPT LONGER THAN YOURS WORHZZ CHARLOTTE!

my mama's buying me sims 3 8D

okay. actually she's giving me 100 bucks to spend cos i'm not going to vietnam with them in the june hols -.-

it's a sad life.

they're going for three weeks while i'm at home alone.

PLAYING SIMS 3.

doesn't seem like a bad idea.

until my mum went "YOU'RE BUYING A GAME?!"

okay. i guess she can't relate sims 2 to sims 3 ._.

i shall consider very hard whether to get sims 3 or not.

homework's zero percent completed.

gonna do everything after sch tmr.

yes, i rock.

Labels: happy, homework, random, school, sj

written on
9:56 PM

Sunday, May 10, 2009

just burnt my tongue eating microwaved subway.

and i'm blogging the way that i tweet.

jeez. i need to start on hw soon.

Labels: homework, random, rants

written on
11:31 PM

miley cyrus and the jo bros are following me on twitter o.o

i think i rock omg.

- edit -

i just found out that it's a fake miley and a fake jo bros -.-

i feel damn cheated.

LOL.

and the accounts are suspended lah wth.

- end edit-

Labels: random

written on
10:01 PM

me wants sims 3 D:

Operation: suck up to mama and clean my room so i get sims 3

in action now.

aw man.

Labels: wants

written on
3:41 PM

follow me on Twitter

i'm lazy to post it on my sidebar.

follow me, yeah?

Labels: random

written on
3:10 PM

Gives You Hell Lyrics

I wake up every evening
With a big smile on my face
And it never feels out of place.
And you're still probably working
At a 9 to 5 pace
I wonder how bad that tastes

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell

Now where's your picket fence love
And where's that shiny car
Did it ever get you far?
You never seem so tense, love
Never seen you fall so hard
Do you know where you are?

Truth be told I miss you
Truth be told I'm lying

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
If you find a man thats worth the damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool you're just as well hope it gives you hell
Hope it gives you hell
[Gives You Hell Lyrics On http://www.elyricsworld.com/ ]
Tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself
Where did it all go wrong?
But the list goes on and on

Truth be told I miss you
Truth be told I'm lying

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
If you find a man that's worth the damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool you're just as well hope it gives you hell

Now you'll never see
What you've done to me
You can take back your memories
They're no good to me
And here's all your lies
If you look me in the eyes
With the sad, sad look
That you wear so well

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell
If you find a man that's worth the damn and treats you well
Then he's a fool you're just as well hope it gives you hell

When you see my face
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell (hope it gives you hell)
When you walk my way
I hope it gives you hell, I hope it gives you hell (hope it gives you hell)
When you hear this song and you sing along well you'll never tell
And you're the fool I've just as well I hope it gives you hell
When you hear this song I hope that it will give you hell
You can sing along I hope that it puts you through hell

been stuck in my head for 5 days.

that's pretty long for a song.

gonna sleep now.

Labels: lyrics

written on
12:45 AM

OH MY.

I SAW MY BLOG HITS TODAY.

AND IT WAS ZERO.

AND I WONDERED WHY D:

then i realised it was 12am -.-

Labels: random, rants

written on
12:00 AM

Saturday, May 9, 2009

c1234

i think now you know why i didn't want to get involved.

because i'm not losing only one friend.

i'm losing two.

(or three. or more.)

because i not only lose the both of you.

i'm losing the trust everyone has in me.

-----

idmi in the morning.

cs concert at night.

don't bother reading whatever that's below.

there's a 80% chance you don't know what i'm talking about.

-----

there was this point of time where i wanted to go whatever. it doesn't concern me.

but it did.

i don't know.

it didn't feel right to help either person.

it felt wrong to not help.

i really didn't know what to do.

and i really don't want to lose either friend.

-----

i saw how she affected you.

stand up for yourself.

please.

get your own viewpoints.

get a life.

-----

i hope you thought it through.

don't set a judgement so fast.

you might just be wrong.

-----

CS concert was fun.

zihighed with kellie & jiayi 8D

thought of a lot of stuff i guess.

jealousy's never good.

Labels: emo, epiphany, feelings, friends, happy, homework, rants, school, supernova, thoughts, tired

written on
11:31 PM

WANG CONG!

happy birthday :D

thanks for being mr president and BAM guy and all that stuff.

AND DEGREE HOLDER O:

haha.

continue bringing southpark to my life.

have fun today (:

Labels: birthday, friends

written on
12:13 AM

Friday, May 8, 2009

sometimes people think they're so deep that they don't see that it's them who's shallow.

you think you know everything, but you don't.

Labels: epiphany

written on
11:52 PM

hi daniel.

some people are just that shallow.

bbyd isn't just another play.

it isn't just for grades or to show off.

chew on that.

Labels: random

written on
11:13 PM

first PT with std 1s

i don't think i've been so tired after a training before.

nor had i felt so accomplished.

smc 1 we did a really good job, ilyouguys :D

& smc 2 i heard you guys were great too :D

& std 3's 09, let's just remain as that, not split up into a million pieces again.

the std 1s were cute, i guess.

reminds me of myself in sec 1.

the oh whatever & training sucks thoughts,

talk about change of mindsets.

i don't love sj.

i just love my sqd and hse (:

-----

today's ms chen's last lesson D:

no more christine as teacher. haha.

i kinda liked her, i guess.

ms yeo's less lively X:

physics prac at lab.

died of laughter.

and fished half the lesson -.-

and zoel laughed at us D:

chem was slack.

blu-tack went missing D:

math was damn funny.

as always x)

hcl was sian.

cloze passage was -.-

tikamed half the thing.

nearly failed ._.

-----

i'm so sleepy now.

idmi meeting + cs concert tmr.

no life ):

imma go blow dry my hair now.

Labels: feelings, friends, happy, school, sj, thoughts, tired

written on
10:38 PM

Thursday, May 7, 2009

i'm sleeping early tonight.

but waking up early tmr.

can't wait for sat.

dinner with kellie.

finally(:

hey.

you've changed, and i'm not the only one who's noticed.

i just want to say, i like the old you more.

because you seem to care more.

because you seem less like the usual school punks.

because you were here when i needed you.

what happened to that past?

what happened to us?

written on
10:19 PM

050709

happy birthday mama :D

and jeng teng.

and someone else who i can't rmb X:

haha.

physics test is over.

geog roleplay is over.

sadly, lvl camp's over too ):

but w/e.

i feel like this huge heavy burden just got lifted up from me.

that's a good thing, i guess.

comp train today.

TOC 8D

i love benny kays?

only 8 more days.

omg.

that's fast D:

okay. i need to polish boots now.

i'm excited for tmr :P

Labels: birthday, family, feelings, friends, happy, school, sj

written on
8:55 PM

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

level camp's cancelled D:

i'm sad. lol.

school was okay.

same old stuff.

and sitting with leshan + shaun is damn amusing.

it's like amanda + shaun again

makes me miss cresmic):

raah.

lunch with clique at hostel.

went home with huijun and jiamin.

saw amanda skipping. haha.

going to sleep like now.

physics + geog + comp train tmr.

wish me luck.

with songs stuck in my head,

xoxochristine(:

Labels: feelings, random, rants, school, tired

written on
11:18 PM

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

i'm tired.

and i havent mugged physics D:

Labels: random, tired

written on
10:46 PM

before i forget,

VERA! ily :D

ty for the bag of encouragement and tidbits.

haha.

it's really very nice(:

AND I WAS MUGGIN WHEN YOU CAME AND DELIVERED IT.

haha. and looked super unglam too -.-

anw, geog script almost done.

SJ proposal + physics left.

Labels: church, feelings, friends, homework, sj, thoughts

written on
9:23 PM

christine's everyday of the week 8D

christine's being a good girl and rewriting all her la lecture notes.

and mugging physics after that.

and then ACE which i have no idea how to mug for.

yes, she's trying desperately to pull up her gpa.

but it's a tad bit too late.

nice day today :D

lunch with 1cresmic LOL.

wuyue + shaun + wangcong.

walked to mcs with pearl + huijun + amanda.

died of laughter with 1C.

haha.

OXYMORON : OXYBITCH : OXYPIMPLECREAM!

and uh. AIRCON + Lady Gaga who's a les.

and wuyue, I 不稀罕 your degree okay?

haha. i PhD alr 8D

i want clique breakfast every monday,

1C lunch every tuesday,

clique lunch @ hostel every wednesday,

Benny training every thursday,

Std 3'09 every friday,

family (shopping) session every saturday,

and church every sunday :D

christine will be very happy if that happens every week.

oh shit.

i realise have to chiong proposal with daniel tonight D:

shall go mug more now. *wears geek glasses*

Labels: church, clique, happy, school, sj

written on
6:34 PM

Monday, May 4, 2009

finished copying 1 page of lecture notes -.-

only 20 pages to go.

wth.

lol.

sian. going to sleep now.

today was a boring and shallow day.

Labels: random, tired

written on
10:58 PM

i'm gonna fail chinese.

answered like 1 out of 6 questions?

died like anything.

and i don't have my LA essay?

so can't do LA hw.

so now i'm stuck between slacking or copying out LA lecture notes or mugging physics.

or quiet time X:

sometimes i wonder, would my life be so much more bleak if I didn't have sth to believe in.

the best part of believe is the lie i hope you sing along & steal a line.

Labels: homework, random, rants

written on
9:19 PM

i finished geog :D

left hcl + physics 8D

Labels: happy, homework

written on
8:31 PM

i shall spend the day after this post mugging.

damn. i'm becoming one of the muggers D:

for the sake of pulling up my physics and geog,

i shall think it's worth it O:

wonderful day today at sch.

i'm tired.

oh my.

this post ain't making sense anymore.

Labels: random, rants, school

written on
6:41 PM

Sunday, May 3, 2009

OH MY!

Christine finished her 演讲词after 2hrs,

is dying of cough + runny nose,

doesn't have a fever so she can't skip sch,

and hotmail AND facebook crashed on her.

good day today.

church was being horribly sick,

sniffed + sneezed + slept through half the sermon X:

pastor kenny and flu medicine just don't go well with alertness.

after service went to mamashop with deborah & kimberlyn.

laughed at pink dolphin + half full fruit juice cartons.

and talked about SYDDA's concert.

I'll try to make it kay, dear?

came home, prepared to leave for Charlotte's,

found out that sick ppl can't go to her hse -.-

stayed home and project-ed the whole afternoon.

the rest you pretty much already know.

i'm falling asleep happy tonight.

and i still want a camera pretty badly /:

Labels: church, happy, notes, rants, school, sick, wants

written on
11:28 PM

i'm still home cos i can't go to charlotte's.

lol.

cos i'm sick.

flu D:

without fever.

which is bad.

cos it means i still have to go to sch.

i'm sad.

doing geog online now.

Labels: school, sick, tired

written on
3:34 PM

you know how the seemingly battle with the world becomes a battle with yourself?

it kinda feels like that now.

Labels: random

written on
1:58 PM

Saturday, May 2, 2009

#10.

i badly wanted to be the only one who knew this secret.

but i guess it's over now.

Labels: emo, feelings, friends

written on
11:25 PM

nineth post today.

i kinda don't see the point in trying to salvage a friendship that's long gone.

i don't know who i'm directing this post to.

it feels like everyone and just you at the same time.

friends.

they come and go.

build your trust, break your heart.

always happens, never fails.

i just wish i can put some of this literal inspiration into geog script.

Labels: feelings, friends, supernova, thoughts, tired

written on
10:49 PM

oh wth.

i accomplished nothing today.

except filing my file.

i feel like a failure.

tmr i aim to accomplish:

1. 3 HCL ws

2. 演讲词

3. Geog

4. LA

5. study for physics (?)

doing geog with charlotte now.

post later.

Labels: feelings, friends, school, sj, thoughts, tired

written on
9:53 PM

ohh man.

i'm crushing on tv men again D:

written on
8:44 PM

what am i doing still slacking here?

oh right.

to make my life miserable.

it's hard not to feel leftout when everyone's in it.

Labels: emo, friends, school, sj

written on
6:31 PM

yeah sure.

just go offline.

just dao me.

fuck.

i don't even care anymore.

i'm rewriting all of last term's notes to file.

and stuff.

mugging keeps my head off stuff.

shit.

my nail just chipped.

Labels: /:

written on
6:02 PM

my mum has a 4.1mp camera.

my sister's phone has a 5mp camera.

my dad's new camera is 10.1mp.

i want a 12.1mp camera.

my phone's 3.2mp.

how am i supposed to survive lvl camp?

with 10 shots of polariods?

yeah sure.

every shot's 3 bucks.

kill it and die.

oh maan.

i'm dying of jealousy.

Labels: /:, wants

written on
5:36 PM

fml like no other.

my daddy bought a camera.

for himself.

he bought 2 waterbottles.

for my siblings.

he bought a massager.

for my mum.

he bought nothing for me.

kay fine.

maybe the camera i wanted was too ex.

maybe the shirts i wanted were too fancy.

maybe getting contacts will kill my eyes.

maybe everything i did wasn't up to standard.

maybe you didn't see what i'm doing.

spent the morning filing my notes.

my dad said: "today must be a special day. she's actually cleaning up"

thanks for not seeing when i cleared my room completely last holiday.

thanks for having the whole wrong side of me.

christle wanted a nike bottle.

you said okay even though mum said no.

you got it for her.

joven wanted that toy thing.

you said okay even though mum said no.

you got it for him.

i wanted a t900.

you brought me to see it.

you got yourself a camera.

in front of me.

and then said 'no. i'm not getting you a camera because i'm broke'.

and then we went to buy a massager for mum.

and then we came home, and i got scolded.

for not cleaning my room.

sure. i'm the free-est person on earth.

unlike you.

to say it doesn't hurt will be a lie.

to say i feel sad would be an understatement.

hey.

sorry for ap-ing you this afternoon.

i guess you have to try to understand,

i can't delph any deeper.

i can't involve myself further.

because everytime i give my heart and soul to help someone,

i end up killing myself.

because everytime i trust someone to be there for me to fall back into,

i end up being backstabbed, and falling into nothing.

because i'm selfish.

i don't want to keep helping people, when i don't have anyone helping me.

because i can't truly say that i want you 2 to be okay again.

because i'm a teenager,

everything seems like death to me.

Labels: emo, family, feelings, friends, supernova

written on
4:59 PM

i want the new clandestine collection.

i want a new camera.

i want new clothes.

i want the money to buy the things i want.

my goodness.

i'm sounding like some small little kid.

Labels: wants

written on
10:46 AM

don't get me caught into this, i don't wanna be part of it.

bad flu today (SWINE FLU D:)

okay. only the runny nose part.

no fever no nth.

spent 7hrs shopping yesterday 8D

saw 4 shirts, 3 jeans and 2 pairs of shoes that I wanted.

ALL OF WHICH COULDN'T BE BOUGHT.

because it was too ex -.-

shirts were $60 odd,

jeans $100 odd,

shoes $100 odd / couldn't be worn to sch -.-

ended buying a lime green fila shoe bag,

my pretty red file,

yellow frixion highlighter,

and had a lot of good food. LOL.

shall eat breakfast now.

Labels: happy, school, sick

written on
10:02 AM

Friday, May 1, 2009

eh my blog got 466 hits last month O:

LOL.

i'm gonna sleep now.

Labels: random

written on
12:12 AM

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